Monday, December 6, 2010

A New Adventure Begins..

So, today a new adventure began. I became a working mama. Kinsley Anne, luckily, is staying at home for another month. Kyle has the ability to be home for 2 weeks and then between his family & my family, they will keep her the 2 weeks after that. THEN she will begin the daycare experience. I am pleased that she will have her 2 month vaccines before going to daycare. I am praying, praying, praying that we can avoid the dreadful RSV.

My emotions were very mixed about the anticipation of this day...terrified to leave my sweet baby, excited for routine, scared that she'd miss me & my voice, happy that she could spend time with daddy, nervous that I'll miss something, and truly horrified at the possible germs that I could potentially bring home to her from the office/hospital. All of the above are normal, I'm sure. Last night, however, the terrified/sad feeling overwhelmed me for about 30 minutes. I got her ready for bed, fed her, and laid her in my arms. I didn't want to put her down. I didn't want to stop staring at her. I didn't want to say goodnight. I didn't want that kiss to be my last kiss for the night. So I just cried for 30 minutes while looking at her. Kyle said "what's wrong? Oh, that was stupid, I shouldn't have asked that." He was right. I knew I was going to have a "moment." I'm sure it was no surprise to him either. But he just put his arms around me and the 3 of us laid together for a little while & I soon felt better. He's great with her. I knew he would do fine at home...and I was right.

Today went smoothly. I got up, pumped, showered, got dressed (in clothes that I had already laid out), cleaned bottles, packed all of my pumping stuff, packed some chicken salad and Wheat Thins for lunch, said goodbye to my sweet & sleeping husband, kissed my baby girl {gently I might add..so that I that wouldn't wake her}, and off I went..I was greeted in the driveway by waves & honking horns from my brother in law (who lives 2 doors down) & soon to be sister as they drove past on their way to work. That made me smile. I listened to my Selah CD on the way to work & it kept me feeling at peace. I called my mom to tell her that I made it out of the house without a breakdown. I saw my patients (all of which showed up. shocker, considering they've been waiting almost 2 months to be able to see me), did a little e-mail and snail mail catch-up, and headed back home. I got home a little early today but it was nice to just ease back into the routine. Everyone at work was amazing. They all greeted me with smiles, "welcome backs," & hugs. Everyone has been genuinely concerned about Kinsley Anne and today was no exception.

Now I get to love on my sweet girl all evening & I will love every single minute of it. One day, maybe I will get to stay home with my kiddo(s) but today was not the day...& I survived!

More bow pictures coming soon! I am starting to really love this bow-making process & I have gotten so many compliments when Kinsley Anne wears them which makes it all the more worth it!

Until Next Time..
Love, Jen

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